I'm Back!

Back from the land of walking pneumonia. Back from coughing all day long. Back from the "embrace the fatigue" blog that I last wrote--it wasn't just fatigue after all.

I must say it's good to be back in time for Christmas. I've been reading through the Christmas story, paying particular attention this year to Mary's perspective as she experiences motherhood for the first time. Her attitude of trust and submission in the midst of the most abnormal pregnancy ever acts as a reminder to me about my attitude of trust through a fairly normal pregnancy. I've found that during this season of my life, I must entrust my body, my marriage, and my parenting skills to Someone greater than myself.

The first, my body, because it's fickle; sometimes it acts as it should, but most often I find that it operates as it (or the baby) sees fit from day to day. Such a range of fatigue, hormones, and symptoms can be frustrating if I'm not willing to take each day in stride. My marriage because I've begun to realize that I will relearn Tim in an entirely new role--as a father as well as my best friend and lover. I expect that we will develop a deeper bond with one another through the crazy-love experience of parenthood, but the change (any change, for that matter) is still a bit scary. And finally, my parenting skills because I don't know what the heck I'm doing. :) I'll start by loving her wildly, beyond what I once thought possible. From there, I'll need help to find the balance between doting and condoning, spoiling and over-protecting.

I figure though that if a 14-year-old girl could be the mother of God, then surely He'll help a 28-year-old be a decent mother to Macie. Merry Christmas, my baby girl. I'll SEE you next year.