Back in Session

School started earlier this August, and my life feels as if I daily press fast-forward from 7:30-4pm Monday-Friday and attempt to slow down and enjoy Tim and Macie the rest of the time. Today Macie came up to school (with Tim--she's not driving yet) to eat lunch "with" or rather "on" mom. The recent school policy this year is that children are not allowed on campus during school hours, and who should happen to run into me, my husband and my four month old? Our headmaster, of course. Thankfully, he was gracious and didn't attempt to remind me of the new policy declared in a first-of-the-year faculty and staff meeting. He asked a few questions about Macie and shook Tim's hand and let us do our thing--or rather Macie do her thing, which was to be carried across campus to a little room off the library, eat heartily, and then spit up.

Although I still haven't cried about going to back to work yet, I definitely feel the pull between professionalism and mommy-hood. I wish I could only teach while Macie is napping and then rush home whenever she wakes up. I also wish that I didn't feel this tug to be excellent at my job and excellent for my baby, but since the tug-of-war does exists, Macie always wins. Even if it means sneaking her on campus under my shirt. I'll just look REALLY pregnant again.